Posted by: happy4life | February 1, 2008

Divorce and Remarriage: Why you should or shouldn’t do it

It is important first to understand the concept of marriage and the spiritual and moral ramifications of this collaboration. Marriage is a spiritual and physical bond shared between a man and woman.

 

Acts 18: 2, 3 The Saved (Christian) couple, under the bond of marriage, should be able to unlock some of the mysteries of God. As the interpreter accompanies the speaker in tongues, they are able, through harmony, to seek and find many answers for themselves as well as others in the Saved community. Their spiritual, physical and intellectual intimacy creates an atmosphere allowing divine intervention in certain areas.

For example, a husband may be in a country far from his wife, but is still able to communicate with her by visitation in the spirit or in a dream in the event of an emergency. (This has happened to a Saved couple I know in real life!) Marriage allows this kind of communication. Matthew 18: 19-20 The Bible states that except for fornication, couples should not divorce.

 

Fornication/Adultery breaks a bond that was first formed with the body of Mashiach (Christ). It severs the ties of intimacy with the righteousness of God creating a gap that takes a tremendous amount of time and prayers to bridge. This puts the spouse of the adulterer/adulteress in a state of spiritual isolation from them, but not God. It takes away from the effectiveness of spiritual answers sought from God by the couple. This is why divorce is recommended in this case. Proverbs 6: 24-35

 

Divorce and remarriage are mentioned in Deuteronomy under the case of the husband finding some fault or discrepancy in the wife. Deuteronomy 24: 1-4. One must bear in mind that receiving the spiritual power of the Holy Spirit and the grace of Yahshuah Ha Mashiach (Jesus Christ), our forerunner and days man, was not present in those days. Even though the bond of spirit is broken after adultery, the bond of flesh remains until either spouse dies, rendering remarriage to a different person as a perpetual state of spiritual in-completion and sin in the sight of God. Matthew 19: 8 and 9.

Divorce (or temporary separation) gives you ‘time out’ to regroup, pray and seek assistance from God, or a pastor as to why your marriage is falling apart, or what led your spouse to be unfaithful. After this, there may be a possibility for God to heal your marriage.

 

I would also like to add to this the evidence I found in Ester chapters 1 and 2. The king put Vashti, his first wife, away and married Ester, his second wife. A clear case of Divorce! But who sanctioned it and why? God did! It was His divine will and his purpose to save the lives of His people. Divorce should only be recommended in the case where one is certain that the offending spouse has not been afflicted with demonic attacks leading to the act of adultery.

 

Also bear in mind that God does not sanction, or agree to some marriages because of the same demonic force instituting a ‘false’ marriage. No one should marry an intoxicated, drugged or hypnotized person, or a person ‘demonically mesmerized. It simply means this person married under influences while they were not ‘aware’ of what they were doing. I have seen it happen before! Proverbs 5:18-21

 

Besides infidelity, one of the most subtle but destructive forces in destroying marriages stems from the spirit of hate. In several instances I witnessed, I noticed a spirit of extreme antagonism and hatred directed toward the wife which stems from the husband. It is a deep rooted hatred which is sometimes a result of bad experiences from childhood, or a hereditary trait. The irony is that some wives claimed, “My husband was very loving and attentive before we became married. I never suspected what was going on. He laid ‘ground rules’ about what I should and shouldn’t do after we were married.” A very calm and quiet and almost, at times, shy deportment follows this.

 

With these men verbal abuse is the characteristic trait and goes unwarranted because it is conveniently a non-chargeable offense. These men cannot do without women, but rather secure one in marriage as a way to vent out hatred and spite for imaginary misdemeanors. This is a serious situation which can lead to a violent breakout on the part of the male spouse after years of pent-up emotions. Very often women find out ‘too late’ about the mental or psychological dilemma that the male spouse is in, especially as it is virtually imperceptible.

 

Oddly enough, these men are master minds at subtly and hiding as most of their mental energy is geared toward subterfuge – in keeping the public ignorant – while desperately trying to appear normal. Tragically, the cover up works and is not discovered until the worst happens. For the most part it is nearly impossible to get them to admit their part in this kind of behavior, much less get them to seek counseling, or pray with their wives to terminate the situation.

The mental state of someone like this could be a result of schizophrenia, manic depressive disorder, or mild autism. Such cases could be mild or severe. It depends on the actions of the person. Please bear in mind that the offending spouse could be female as well. Regardless of gender, both spouses should seek help.

 

Satan is at the head of every form of destruction in marriage. One demon mainly responsible for failure in marriages is Lepersore. A demon that, in relation to the disease it is named after, slowly eats at marriages. On more than one occasion I have interviewed a married man or woman who mentioned that, ‘There was a pressure on the bed beside me. I turned around thinking it was my spouse, but there was no one there.’ Shortly after this the couple would experience complications in their marriage.

 

The issues I mentioned above follow under the category of demonic attacks. It is more deadly than physical abuse in marriage because very often it goes undetected and unresolved. It takes a spouse that is patient and rooted in God to remain in a marriage such as this. Getting involved in a trust worthy prayer group with family, friends, or the children is a good start toward deliverance.

 

Marrying someone else before this spiritual predicament is cleared up with the offending spouse, be they male or female, will more or less leave matters unfinished in the sight of God. Please remember that you did join with this person for better, or worse. Think carefully and ask God’s council before thinking of marrying again and, as I said, get help and support! Temporary or permanent separation should definitely be recommended for partners encountering physical abuse. Here are some U.S. and international statistics on divorce rates.


An outbreak of “matrimonial millennium madness” has led one of Britain’s
leading divorce lawyers to refuse to take on any new clients. The number
of couples splitting up has reached such huge proportions that matrimonial
law specialists Lloyd Platts & Co has had to turn people away.

http://www.divorcereform.org/mel/rmillendivbritain02.html

Using a quasi-experimental pre-post intervention design and archival
data from the National Center for Health Statistics, a team of
researchers at the University of Oklahoma examined the effect adoption
of no-fault divorce law had on the divorce rate across the 50 states.
Among the other variables median family income was the only

 

significant predictor of the change in divorce rate; the adjusted no-
fault divorce rate increased as median family income increased.

http://patriot.net/~crouch/adr/nakonezny.html

I did a poll and, from a few cases I have seen of married couples, I have found that in cases where spouses committed adultery, most of the un-offending spouses eventually died from A.I.D.S., heart failure, or stress related maladies if they did not separate from the offending spouse. In most of these cases, it was the woman who stayed with her husband.

Cheating Husband/ couple divorce
24%
C.H./couple stay together/wife dies
21%
C.H./couple stay together
15%
Man marries under influence of drugs/witchcraft
10%
C.H./couple die from A.I.D.S.
6%
C.H./couple divorce/wife gets new partner
6%
C.H./couple stay together/husband dies
6%
C.H./couple sleep separate/husband dying
3%
Cheating wife/couple stay together
3%
Cheating wife/wife dies
3%


All information for this report came from the Bible and my personal interviewing and polling in my area for a span of over 12 years. The age ranges of the couples are 18 – 76

PLEASE NOTE! No matter how hurt you are it would be a sin against God – and yourself – if you retaliate against your spouse by cheating back! The wages of sin is still death! Stoning may no longer be in effect, but the law of God still is. John 8:7

Adultery is not just a sin of the flesh, but the spirit. If you are the victim of infidelity, this is the time to pour out your heart to God, a friend, or a family member. Don’t allow Satan to use you in that way. The repercussions that result in this are manifold.

A woman sought revenge on her husband for his infidelity. Shortly after that, tragedy struck. One of their children were in intensive care after an accident and none of them felt close enough to the Lord to pray, since one of them were found committing the sin at the time they were informed of the accident. Unfortunately the child died. Be careful in choosing a marriage partner. Ask God’s guidance before you take your vows. Marriage is an event too sacred to be scarred!

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Responses

  1. Happenings in in love, Life, Marriages and Religion can not be seperated. really a thought and keep posting!

    http://www.indiamatrimony.com for indian matrimonials

  2. I think this is a very interesting question. I work for http://www.firstwivesworld.com which is an online community for women navigating through the various stages of divorce. We have many members and experts in various stages of divorce, remarriage, and redivorce. It is interesting to see each person’s different view and ideaology on the topic, how they decided if they should or should not get remarried. Sometimes it is easier to make a decision or contemplate something if you have spoken with or heard someone else’s view who is in the same or similiar situation as you. Check it out at http://www.firstwivesworld.com
    Just my two cents
    Ann Marie


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